STOP THE PRESSES AND CALL MY MOTHER – AT LAST, WE HAVE A MICROWAVE ON CAMPUS!
In a shock announcement from UL Student Life (ULSL), one glorious microwave has been delivered to the University of Limerick. There are some who might deride a single microwave for a 15,000+ student body,- but spare a thought for those who bring a packed lunch.
I myself have had to host those poor unfortunate souls who, god forbid, could not heat up their food on campus. So sad, yet so true. But worry no longer! At last, the election promise that is never fulfilled has been, the Student Life crew have delivered! One, brand spanking new, perfectly serviceable, microwave. No wonder UL was given University of the Year 2019.
But seriously, this is a great incentive for students to bring a packed lunch. One less fiver into Spar, one more into Stables, lads. Or in the bank, if that’s your fancy. Of course, going into winter a good hot meal can make or break a day for anyone. For all of us living on a student budget, we won’t always be able to afford that hot chicken roll.
The microwave can be found in the Common Room in the SU building, behind the pool room. It’s currently on a pilot test for six weeks and depending on how that goes, it will then become a permanent fixture of the University of Limerick Student Life Centre.
This is if we aren’t totally dense and treat it with the respect it deserves. “We Clean, You Keep,” is the phrase of the day, kids. It’s not your property, so don’t be a twat and clean up after yourselves, as the posters with horribly outdated memes kindly remind you. There’s even sprays and rags for the clumsier folk out there. If you need more information, contact Ciara Jo at studentpresident@ul.ie.
(P.S. please don’t actually call my mother, the poor woman already has enough to deal with.)
Rohan Coleman 
Molly Cantwell